Is there going to be a school where all the little Angel babies go together? A pop-up creche that sits alongside the lingerie-packed Christmas special photoshoots?
Behati Prinsloo announced she was pregnant with her first baby about a week ago and the internet went wild. Then Candice Swanepoel shared an image of her belly with the news that she was entering her second trimester, and boy oh boy, is it just me, or did people lose their minds?!
Why? Why do people get so crazy about the idea of VS Angels having babies? It’s more than your normal celebrity-news hype. There’s something odd going on.
Here’s my theory:
The VS Angels are specimens. Rigorous workouts and strict eating plans help them maintain the bodies of athletes. Combine this with winning-the-genetic-lottery facial structures, and you have the apex of our generation’s commercial beauty ideals. Different from the Paris-runway-waif look, these women are the examples of “sexy” that we’re sold.
Sitting high up there on those pedestals makes it irresistible for the rest of us to watch on and see what happens when a spanner (spermatoza) is thrown into the mix (womb).
What are they gonna look like with a big bump? Will they quit modelling? Are they going to be ready for the next runway? Do they even want to?
I mean, come one, is there a secret “Golden-Wings Award” for fastest post-baby-to-runway recovery? Miranda Kerr got to wear the $2.5 million Fantasy Bra the year she made a triumphant return to the runway after having her first child. Heidi Klum set the record when she walked the runway just 5 weeks after giving birth a few years ago. Adriana Lima did it in 5 weeks with her belly exposed.
I can’t even commit to buying diet Greek yoghurt 5 weeks in a row.
Most women can’t exercise twice in a day and most women don’t have personal chefs or rockstar husbands. But every society has its mythologies and we all feel good when we aspire towards self-improvement. For me, the critical thing to remember is that these women are paid to sell products and that so long as we remember that and enjoy they show, we’ll be okay.
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You should also read:
I Ain’t Afraid of No Subconscious Gender Bias
Why Are My Nipples Still Such a Big Deal? (FYI: Yours Are Too)
5 Lessons in Life (and Style) I Just Learnt from the Oscars